My Lolo Tisyo (my dad’s uncle) passed away last week. My sister and I went to the wake and joined in the “paghahatid” (convoy from the memorial chapel to the burial site). At the site, the family released butterflies and balloons. All the butterflies flew away except for one who lingered near my lolo’s casket. It was the butterfly released by my Lola Miling (my Lolo Tisyo’s wife).
My Uncle Cesar, my lolo’s eldest son was tasked with giving the eulogy. Listening to him speak evoked memories of my father. When my dad passed away years ago, the task of giving the eulogy was assigned to me. I found an empty bench and began with a blank notebook, trying to list all of my father’s qualities, one on every page then expounding on each. My Kuya, upon seeing the several pages that I have completed commented “wag sobrang haba, mga ten minutes lang”. My task then became difficult--- how do you sum up a man’s life in ten minutes? Impossible. Unless you take out all the details and you’re left with just the frame of the life he has lived. At the church, I think it took me longer than ten minutes to say my piece because I broke down in tears several times. Looking back, the trip to the hospital, the wake, the eulogy, the interment, those were easy. The most difficult part was coming home and he wasn’t there anymore.
3 comments:
nakakaiyak naman yan yoyang. i don't think i ever offered my condolence as di ko nalaman at that time. kaya condolence on your dad's passing pati na rin for your lolo tisoy.
buti may strength ka pa gumawa ng eulogy, pero I guess si Lord binigyan tayo ng inherent strength para dalhin ang mga pangyayarin yan at gampanan ang ating duties. don't know what else to say, the pain must be very very deep. i just hope na with the passing of time eh maibsan ng tuluyan yung sakit at mapalitan ng mga ngiti sa magagandang alaalang iniwan nya. your dad lived such a fruitful life...you're blessed to have had him and vice versa.
Atilapya, naku, don't worry about it. I know in my heart that you sympathize, no need for words to be spoken.
Alam mo, when it happened noon, ayokong kumausap ng kahit sino. 'Leave me alone' baga. Sinabihan pa nga ako ng kuya ko to go out and entertain the visitors. Sa isip ko naman-- entertain? They don't need to be entertained ano. But good manners dictate that I go out and talk to the visitors, some of them strangers to me. They would asked the same question- 'how did he die?' and I, like a tape recorder, will repeat the same story. Nakatulong ito ng malaki kasi nakakamanhid, it takes your mind off the grief for brief periods of time.
I've been okay na about it for a long time, have not cried nor felt the heavy feeling for years. I can mention may dad and talk about my memories of him with a smile. Di na nangigilid ang aking mga luha like before. Eto nga lang recent na nangyari, naging trigger. When I grieved for my lolo, nasali na din Daddy ko.
Yoyang, nakakaiyak nga ito, at yung naaalala kong sinulat mo about your dad. But at the same time, nakaka-touch ang love & tribute mo sa kanya, at very inspiring ang buhay nya! Di ko rin nalaman nung time na yun, kaya my sympathies to you & your family on your Dad and your Lolo too. May the Lord Jesus comfort, strengthen, and bless you & your family!
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